Where did I spend my yesterday (Saturday)? We decided to go on a road trip to Long Beach, Washington to see “the tabloid king – Jake the Alligator Man.” I’m in to weird things like this. I know, aim high right. I probably should have gone next weekend, because it will be Jake’s 75th birthday.

According to Wikipedia,

“Jake the Alligator Man is an alleged half-man, half-alligator on display in apparently mummified condition at Marsh’s Free Museum, a tourist trap located at 409 South Pacific Avenue in Long Beach, Washington. He was acquired by the Marsh’s for $750 in 1967 from an antique store. His image was used by the Weekly World News on November 9, 1993 for front-page article, “Half-human, half-alligator discovered in Florida swamp.” The periodical subsequently reported on his escape from captivity, killing of a Miami man, and giving birth. Jake has acquired a cult following in Northwestern popular culture. Bumper stickers featuring the oddity can be commonly seen throughout Washington and Oregon.”


How could I not go?

The weather was nice. The drive down there was nice. We passed a big rig carrying corrosive material in a trailer that looked like it had been rolled off a cliff. Safety first right?


We had to pass though Astoria, Oregon on the way to Long Beach, because Long Beach is pretty much a big sandy peninsula on the coast of southern Washington with only one way in and one way out (The Astoria Bridge). I love Astoria. If you don’t think you know what it looks like, but you’ve seen the movie The Goonies then you’ve seen Astoria. It’s a sleepy little town on the mouth of the Columbia River that is packed with historic homes, and spectacular water views.


One thing I did notice is they have a few brand new medical facilities in Astoria…..Hmm maybe a future job in a REALLY cool town? Hint hint wink wink. Maybe if I got a job there, I could live in a cool old city AND satisfy my lust for historic architecture.


Once we reached Long Beach the little town reminded me a lot of a miniature Santa Cruz, California. The buildings looked a lot alike, the general vibe was a lot like Santa Cruz. The only thing Long Beach was missing was the traffic and the crowds. I even got a respectable lunch of fish, chips, and clam chowder.

We looked around Marsh’s Free Museum which is regarded as a tourist trap, but I thought it was amazing. Sure it was full of trinkets and tourist shwag, but it was also full of old side show looking stuff like weird taxidermy (like Jake), antique stuff, and vintage carnival games like the test your strength squeeze game, and the old timey games that tell your future. I can’t get enough of that stuff. “Stuff” is cool especially when it’s old dusty stuff.



Hmmm I’m really not sure why WrodPress insists on placing this picture on it’s side, but I can’t seem to rotate it. either way, you get the picture. Stupid free weblog.

IMG_2202This one keeps posting sideways too. Sometime I want to slap the crap out of free things that don’t work. What I wanted to say was this is definitive proof that werewolves, AND Jack-o-Lopes exist although that werewolf may have bad breath…..

After checking out every inch of Marsh’s, we had some lunch at a place next door that sold Oceanside type food (fried food). After eating WAY too much, I had to go walk it off. We walked up and down the main drag, checked out a pretty big candy store (I bought a bunch of “stuff” to eat in front of a camera – more about that later). We got to check out the “Yarn Car” which was pretty cool, but obviously a fair weather car. Then we drove down to the beach.





Heh Nice butt.

Long Beach is one of the few beaches where you can drive on the sand. Mom wanted to drive on the beach, but I didn’t think it was a good idea. I’ve driven in salt water with past vehicles, and they were soon consumed by rust. Oh hell no. We did watch a bunch of big kites for a bit that were anchored to the ground and looked to be as big as a king size bed.



The kite in the center is larger than the truck that drove it there.

Later, we drove up the last bit of the peninsula which was full of some pretty cool beach houses. I need to look up some of them on Zillo to see how much they cost. A lot of them seemed to be for sale. I guess they can be expensive if you are fifty miles and a bridge crossing away from the nearest decent sized city.

All in all it was a pretty good day. On the drive home, I even drove past a radar cop doing 30mph over the posted limit. The highway patrolman was pointed the opposite way, and got blocked by a long string of cars heading the opposite way. Hee hee.