It’s almost been a month since I posted something. School has been crazy, and I haven’t had much time for anything. When I do have down time, I’m so tired I don’t do much at all. One thing I have been doing is logging crazy. I keep telling myself to carry a small note pad so I can keep tabs of happenings in the wild (aka at school and on the bus), but I never do. Instead, I text myself.

This afternoon I was looking at my text log and noticed I had about six things or so that I hadn’t posted yet. Well here you go. All of the bold/italicized parts are the reminder texts about the things that happened within the past few weeks. I couldn’t believe some of them either….

OK there are a few from October…sue me.

October 14, 2013

Why is it that people who have been to jail feel they have to tell everyone about their “situation”…This guy has been blabbing about his sit for 2 hours. I need to replace my noise canceling earphones….

I don’t even think the woman he was talking to even knew this guy. He seemed normal until she said some magic trigger word that set him off. Then he endlessly blabbed for close to two hours about his time in the clink, his problems that he was getting a handle on, and all of his issues since leaving the clink. Why do people do that? Are there some sort of rehabilitation steps ex-cons have to take when they leave prison? Really, there are some things you just don’t throw out there to a perfect stranger even if you think she thinks you’re cute….just sayin.

Later that afternoon I witnessed some Facebook crazy being unleashed on another complete stranger.

Holy shit! TMI! TMI! “This is my Lost in Space robot warning that goes off in my head every time I hear things that should never be yelled out in a public place. My robot warning goes off a lot.”

Crazy bitch. For not caring about a Facebook stalker you sure blabbed a lot about it! You sound more crazy about the person you’re bitching about. She is chattering like a machine gun – lay off the damn caffeine!!!!

Soon after the jail guy’s ride showed up to give him a ride, some other woman just sat down and started talking to a guy who looked like he was just there to eat his lunch. She was pissed about some “whore” who kept “sayin shit about her and her old man.” The guy was trying to ignore her, but she kept on rattling off obscenities left and right. Apparently some woman has been “talking behind her back on Facebook about the way she’s rain her damn kids.” I don’t know how you talk behind someone’s back on a public social media site? Seems to me if everyone can see these posts it’s more like talking right to half the world, and that’s hardly behind your back. The guy didn’t know what to say, but it didn’t matter, crazy town was talking a mile a minute. She had a giant iced coffee in her paw, so she was probably hopped up on caffeine. Once again, you should probably keep that stuff you yourself. I think it’s funny how people think they are getting back at the ones they hate by de-friending them on Facebook.

OOooooh I’m not your friend anymore..

Promise?

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Parking wiz. 2 spaces is one.

As I was finishing my morning bagel, I noticed some boob park right in the middle of two parking spaces, get out to look at the spaces then leave. I guess those spaces were specially reserved for his crap can of a car. Back in the day if I had pulled into a full lot and saw this idiot’s car, I would have left him a thank you message in the form of a boot print to remind him that taking two spaces in a crowded lot is the sign of an asshole.

People who spit all day

Why do some people feel they have to spit on the ground as much as possible? I swear this kid spit about twenty times in about twenty feet. If he keeps that up, he’ll need to drink some water. Watching him was like watching something from Monty Python. The machine-gun spitter. He could spit a bird out of the sky at thirty paces….

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This damn woman is drunk. Grad, but back for a proficient cert because she can’t find a fuckin job. Start my own fuckin business.

 This woman was nuts. I was sitting close to one of those courtesy phones in common area when this ratty looking woman waddled up and says she needs to use the phone. Before I can move out of her way, she leans right across the front of me and starts using the phone. She starts swearing at the person on the other end, and slams the phone down. Right then, someone she knows is walking past her and the crazy woman asks her for a ride. The woman with a car asks her where she’s headed, and crazy town tells he she needs to get down town (technically three blocks away). The woman with the car thinks real fast, and says she is headed in the opposite direction. Crazy town says “that’s fine can I hitch a ride?” Car woman says she can’t and scoots out the door real quick. Crazy town isn’t phased and begins talking to someone else she recognizes. The new woman looks at crazy town and says “didn’t you graduate last year?” Crazy town responds with “yeah, but I’m back for my proficiency certification, because I can’t find a fuckin job. Fuck it, I’m gonna start my own fuckin business!”

Now I want to know what business she is thinking about starting? Couldn’t be crack dealer, because she acts like she’s already done all the crack she can handle. Maybe she couldn’t find a fuckin job, because she says the word fuckin about fifty times a minute, and drunk shakes like she’s gonna fall over even when she is standing still. Those two things alone should have landed her a job someplace by now? She must be trying too hard.

Can I have a ride? Crack kills

After she leaves, the second woman tells to the guy she’s sitting with that she gave crazy town a ride the week before, and she wouldn’t get out of the car. Every time they got to where she said she needed to go, crazy town would give her a new address. She finally left her on the side of the road, and said she was totally happy with where she ended up. All I could think of is this woman riding down the road with her head out the window barking at cars. When I mentioned the barking at cars part to my friend, she spit up her milk all over her homework. Maybe she was thinking the same thing I was, but was too embarrassed to say anything.

I have a few more to write, but it’s getting late. I swear I’m not making this up. Hooray for two things: drugs, and Community College!

 

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