Category: Comedy


Look! I got crabs!

Not those crabs silly! These crabs were crunchy and delicious! This was also a test to see how well my new camera setup is working. I guess it’s working fine.

~ Enjoy

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HAPPY HALLOWEEN! I ate some chips in a special way for the holiday! Enjoy and have a safe holiday!

Don’t east too much candy!

Mmmmm Sriracha flavored popcorn! It’s was magically delicious.

Episode 5 of the Box of Crap series. This stuff is delicious!

Bugs……crunchy, tasty…..bugs

This weekend was pretty wild. A friend of mine invited me to his birthday party. He likes my YouTube channel and asked if we could film an episode or two in his garage. I said sure, and since we didn’t really nail down what we would be reviewing, and I just got a big shipment of edible bugs from Thailand, we ate some crunchy stuff.

The first to get chomped were armor tail scorpions which tasted exactly like sunflower seeds if you can believe that. We then feasted on an assortment of pupa which were not my favorite at all. Way too mealy. Next was the star of the show which was a can containing two big zebra tarantulas. I have a VERY strong stomach, so I crunched the bigger one down without hesitation. It really didn’t have any flavor at all. It tasted like a Cheese Puff without the cheesy flavor. We finished off our bug fest with Queen Weaver Ants, and small crickets. The weaver ants were sort of sweet and sour, and the crickets were flavored with salt and maybe lime. The crickets were the best tasting of all the bugs probably because they were flavored.

Once we wrapped everything up I dared the birthday boy to eat the remaining tarantula. He has a severe case of arachnophobia, and froze as soon as it touched his hand, but he did it. He popped the thing in his mouth and downed it like a boss. hahahahahaha

We conquered our fears this weekend. Some of our fears tasted better than others, but we still conquered them.

IMG_0648Mmmmmm furry

IMG_0650And crunchy…

 

 

Good Stuff

I’m havin a little of this before bed.

scotch-glass

I have a ton of booze left over from the bar I had in my old house. Can’t let it go to waste. Had some 12 year old Glenfiddich before bed last night and slept like a baby.  Well I had a weird dream, but I still slept like a baby. What did I dream you ask? I dreamt that I met up with my ex-girlfriend for dinner. There were a bunch of people from one of my old jobs in the restaurant, but they were people I never liked so we ignored them. Other than the co-worker thing we had a nice time (we’re still friends). It was after dinner where it got a little weird. We were walking to our cars which for some reason meant climbing a ratty chain link fence and walking behind a dark building. When we got to our cars, she showed me a cigar she said one of her friends had given her. For some reason it was as big as my arm. At first I thought the circumstance was a little weird, because she doesn’t smoke, but then I told her about a friend of mine whose family owned a cigar shop (I really do know them). I told her how they got in trouble for selling things like Cuban cigars and had to shut their shop down (really happened). For some reason a baseball bat sized cigar seemed totally normal, so I showed her how to properly light it. Then we sat on the tailgate of my old truck, that I haven’t owned in fifteen years, and smoked it. HAHAHAHAHAHA

believe-it-or-not-ripley-nearly-forgotten

Seemed like the thing to do?

Teddy

I sometimes make noises like this when I eat.

Eagle throws goat mountain?

Someone sent me this through YouTube. All it said was “eagle throws goat mountain?” With a name like that, of course I had to watch it.

I think it’s pretty safe to say that eagle is a jerk.

Crazy Dreams

feed_the_kitty_1_1I wish we could record out dreams. Mine have been pretty weird this week. After watching an episode of The Incredible Dr. Pol just before going to bed I had a dream that someone gave me a kitten. That’s fine, because I’d love to adopt a cat named Larry. However this kitten refused to sleep in his bed. He would only sleep under my chin. He was small and fluffy, so I couldn’t deny him sleep time….

Last night I had a dream that I was in my childhood home having a party with all kinds of friends I haven’t seen in years. Everything was great until some fast talker showed up and stole my girlfriend. ? I didn’t know I had a girlfriend, but I sure wasn’t about matrix_punchto stand by and let some asshat steal her away from me. I ended up punching him a few times in front of the house. When I told him to get lost, he tried to get back in the house. This is when my friends stepped in and told him to leave. I haven’t seen those friends in over twenty years. I guess it’s good to know they will still back me up if the need arises. The rest of the party went fine even though I didn’t see my girlfriend. I guess it wasn’t a total loss; I didn’t even know her name.

Dates…Not the kind you eat.

A friend told me about an on-line dating site. She said it would be fun. She told me to quit being a baby and fill out the profile information. So I did. What did I learn about myself while filling out the profile? I’ve become a very boring person. This might be funny.

What do people notice about you first?

“I’m a big guy, so people are usually afraid of me when they first see me. Once I make them laugh its all good.”

Sorry, just being truthful.

 

I also noticed that I don’t have any serious pictures of myself since losing a crap ton of weight. Maybe I should just use one of my avatars.

Kevin

I kind of like this one. It actually looks like me.

 

profile_pic

This one may be a little over the top….